What Bloodberry Had To Do
by Bloodberry
Summary: This is the story of what I had had to do to get the X-Men to be in my fanfics. Professor X, Jean Grey, and Scottie!


# What Bloodberry had to do 

This is the story of what I had to do to make the x-men be in my fanfics.

X-Men are not mine they belong to marvel. The X-Men must do my biding. It's in their contract.

# Sometime in Xavier's Office…

(Knock, knock)

Professor X: (Hides the weed he's been smoking under his desk) Yes? Come in.

Bloodberry: (Cheerfully) Hiiiiii!  
  


Professor X: So… you're that sorceress girl who controls elements. 

Bloodberry: (Very enthusiastically) That's right! I wanna be an x-men!

Professor X: Hmm.

Bloodberry: I can kick Magneto's ass! (Shoves Magneto's red helmet in front of Xavier's face.)

# Professor X: (Stunned) How in the world did you get th///

Bloodberry: Never mind that! So can I join the x-men team? Pretty please? I'm very powerful!

Professor X: Hmm… Okay. You're hired.

Bloodberry: Hired?

Professor X: Never mind.

Bloodberry: But…I need my parent's permission. (Shoves a contract thingy in Professor X's face) So you have to sign this! 

Professor X: Umm, sure. (Professor X signs the contract thingy)

(That idiot doesn't realize that parents are the one's who have to sign permission slips. He's no genius)

@_@

Bloodberry: (Grabs the contract from Xavier's hand) Yesssssss! I did it!

Professor X: Did what?

Bloodberry: (Rips the 2nd part of the contract and hands it to Xavier) Here, you have to have a copy so you'll be prepared of what's to come.

(Professor X reads the contract. Suddenly his eyes widen. )

Professor X: NOOOOOOO!!!!! Not another one. I hate being manipulated by a couple of talent less wanna be authors! 

Bloodberry: (Angrily) You shouldn't have said that. Now I'll make you suffer. Never insult fanfiction writers. I mean after all, we are the ones who hold your fate in the palm of our hands.

Professor X: Hmm.

Bloodberry: If you say hmm one more time I swear I'm gonna///

(Black smoke starts to cover the room)

Bloodberry: Professor…your desk is on fire.

Professor X: Nooo! Not again!

Bloodberry: See ya! Peace!!!

(Bloodberry walks out the door)

Professor X: Hey hold on a minute!!!

Bloodberry: (Takes a deep breath) Bolero of blood!

(Bloodberry vanishes in a cloud of red smoke)

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# Somewhere in Xavier's School For the Gifted…

Jean: I want a 600-word essay by tomorrow morning.

Students: (Sarcastically) Yes Miss Gray.

Bobby: Weeeee!

. 

(Makes an ice skateboard and skates away leaving a trail of ice)

Jean: Bobby you are making a mess. That's a one-hour detention! Bobby…Bobby get back here!

(Students stand up and run out of Jean's class)

Jean: Hey wait! Oooooh, sometimes I could just burn em all!

(Someone stands outside the classroom door)

Bloodberry: Well we wouldn't want you to have a Carrie episode.

Jean: AHHH! Don't sneak up on me! Who are you?

(Bloodberry goes into the classroom)

Bloodberry: (Happily) I'm your new student! Professor X said you're gonna give me a tour of the school.

Jean: (Murmurs) You'd make friends with Jubilee really, really fast perky girl.

Bloodberry: (Enthusiastically) What was that? I can't hear yoooo!

Jean: Uh, nothing. Didn't the professor give you a tour? He loves to give tours. 

Bloodberry: Um, (Looks at doorway towards Xavier's office) He's a little preoccupied right now.

Jean: Okay. Follow me.

(Mutant school theme music plays on background…the same one that was used on Logan when Professor X gave him a tour.)

# Jean: Here at Xavier's School for the Gifted teach students how to//

Bloodberry: Um…don't you get tired of teaching the same class with those kids using their mutant powers to disrupt you everyday…over and over again?

Jean: Sometimes…why do you ask?

Bloodberry: Looks like you need a vacation.

Jean: Vacation, HA! I wish but I'm a teacher. I can't afford a decent vacation on a teacher's pay.

Blooberry: My cousin works at a travel office. She could send you and Scott to Hawaii! 

Jean: Oh.

Bloodberry: (Desperate voice) Umm, you'll get 50% off all your travel expenses! 

Jean: Fifty percent off! 

# Bloodberry: Uhh huh! __

Jean: I'm so there!

Bloodberry: Here.(Hands a weird contract thingy at Jean) You have to sign this…for your trip an all.

Jean: Sure, anything to get away from those pesky punks.

(Jean takes out a pen and signs the contract thingy) 

Bloodberry: Yessss! (Snatches contract from Jean's hands) 

Jean: Now do I get to go to Hawaii?

Bloodberry: Uhh, sure. (Hands Jean second part of the contract) Here, you need a copy of the thing you just signed. Read it.

(Jean reads it and drops it)

Jean: No, not another one. You little whore! You tricked ME!!!

Bloodberry: Bye now! 

Bloodberry: (Takes a deep breath) Bordello, I mean Bolero of… aw hell!

Pouf 

(Bloodberry vanishes in a cloud of smoke)

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Garage of X.S.F.T.G 

Cyclops: And that's how you fix a bike. Of course if I had my bike I could actually teach you how to do it the right way! DAMN YOU LOGAN!!!

(The veins on Scott's forehead get huge!)

Blue hair student: Are you okay Mr. Summers?

Cyclops: Shut the hell up! Everyone get out!

Jubilee: What a prick!

Kitty: I know. He used to be so nice. 

Bobby: He's lost it ever since Wolverine took his bike. 

Fat student: Sir Scott hasn't been the same since.

Kitty: I hear he's breaking up with Jean. 

Jubilee: He's been bad in bed?

Kitty: Yup.

Blue hair boy: Wolverine rules!

Bobby: Wolvie's the man!

(Cyclops who was listening to the entire conversation the whole time reaches for the button on his ruby visor)

Bobby: Run! Mother-Scott has gone insane!

(Cyclops shoots an optic blast at bobby but doesn't come even close to hitting him. Instead he hit's Professor X's very expensive Mercedes Benz!)

Cyclops: AGGG…(Chokes) CRAAAPPPPP!!!

(Students run away scared)

(Bloodberry walks cautiously up to Scott)

Bloodberry: Hello sir…Uhh, Wolverine sucks?

Cyclops: Damn right!

Bloodberry: (Murmurs) No he doesn't. God I fell so dirty.

Cyclops: What was that?

Bloodberry: Nothing. What would you say if I could get you your bike back?

Cyclops: I'd say you're hallucinating. (Sadly) No one can detach Logan from my bike.

Bloodberry: Follow me!

(Cyclops follows Bloodberry outside the front gate)

Bloodberry: Ta da! (Bloodberry pulls out a big cape and throws it to the ground then lifts it back up)

(Scott's bike appears)

# Cyclops: (Choking) How you get it b///

Bloodberry: Never mind that.

Cyclops: All right!  
  


Bloodberry: Hold on. You have to sign this. (Pulls out another contract thingy)

Cyclops: Anything to get my beloved bike back. (Cyclops signs the contract thingy)

(Bloodberry snatches the contract from Scott's hand)

Bloodberry: Ha! I did it again!

Cyclops: (Runs over to kiss his bike) My baby! My poor baby! I MISSED YOU SO MUCH! (He begins to cry and kiss his bike)

(With a sorry look on her face Bloodberry rips the 2nd part of the contract) 

Bloodberry: Here, you have to read this.

(Scott reads the 2nd part of the contract than falls to his knees)

Cyclops: Damn it! No! Not again! NOOOOO!!!

Bloodberry: You said you'd do anything to get your bike back.

Cyclops: AHHHHH!

(Cyclops insanely runs to the middle of the road. A car hits him. He goes sailing into the air and falls on his bike)

Bloodberry: Ouch! That had to hurt!  
  


Cyclops: (Dizzy) I'm okay. I'm okay.

(Cyclops stands in front of his bike and starts murmuring something about getting even with Logan, and then he finally faints)

Bloodberry: Oops.

(A girl with blue hair suddenly appears in a cloud of blue smoke)

Blueberry: (My cousin) Do you have to be so tricky? 

Bloodberry: I'll do anything to get the X-Men's signatures on these contracts. 

Blueberry: So, who's your next victim?

Bloodberry: Hmm. Oh great so now Professor X has got me saying it!

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Sorry, Cyclops gets on my nerves sometimes. Review OK! ^-^


End file.
